Vampire or Human?

Once a Human, then turned Vampire I became powerful.

I'm having this internal struggle with myself. A long time ago I thought I knew who I was. I was dead set in a specific way of life and I loved it. However, that was a very dark time in my life. A time in my life where, not only could I not see the light, I literally spent all of my time out of it.

Back then, I was a vampire (in a metaphorical sense of course). I slept most of my days or very short hours and spent my nights awake and staring at the stars outside of my window. Often I would contemplate what it would be like to be a fictional character in a book like 'Infinite Days' by Rebecca Maizel. I enjoyed the taste of blood and was excited at the thought of a pair of teeth over my jugular. Although, a lot of this remained true even now. But, I feel like I have lost certain aspects of this. I've slowly gone from being a creature of the night, to being a creature of daytime and sunlight.

I've become what I fear the most. An average ordinary everyday girl. My skin once pale, a colour I had slaved over for months to obtain, is gone. Now? Now instead I am tanned, the colour of caramel. I don't even dress the same anymore. This is possibly one of the things I miss the absolute most. I miss my corsets, my heels and my netted stockings. I miss the moon and the dark crisp night air. My human me is nothing compare to the dark queen that once reigned within.

I am nothing.
Once Vampire, now, nothing more then a defenseless Human.